Woman Scared by Pastry

We’ve all been there- it’s dark outside, and something just outside your window is giving you the creeps. Is it a stalker? A rabid racoon? Emilio Estevez from the 1980s classic Stakeout? And what do you do?

A woman in Krakow, Poland found herself in just a situation a few weeks ago and, in an effort to get her visitor to go away, called the police.

He’d been stalking her for the past two days, she said, and she was scared to open the windows, lest he get in. When animal control finally showed up, the animal turned out to be… a croissant. Thank God there’s photographic proof.

Police theorized that someone likely threw the delicious pastry into a tree to feed the animals and it got stuck.

And we guess this is a reasonable deduction, but, allow us a moment, Inspector Lestrade, to theorize that this was a decoy croissant, thrown into the tree to distract the residents from the large Boston Creme donut creeping up from the other side of the apartment building…