Gay Male Penguins Steal Egg From Lesbian Couple

Two gay male penguins are in the news again.

We all first learned of the couple (whose names have not been released), last year when they stole the egg of a heterosexual penguin couple. They took turns sitting on the egg, and fending off anyone who would try to come near. Unfortunately the egg never did hatch, but the duo are up to it again.

The penguins live in a Dutch zoo, where, we can only guess, zookeepers wear clogs?

You could call these particular penguins Clyde and Clyde because they have once again made off with something that is not theirs. This time, they have stolen the nest AND the egg of a lesbian penguin couple. Again, the two dudes are taking turns sitting on the egg, but seeing as it’s unfertilized, they are again to be sorely disappointed.

As you probably know from the back of a cereal box or one of those nature card kits they’d send you in the mail and your parents would never order the rest of the cards, penguins mate for life.

Scientists do not know if same-sex relationships are normal in penguins in the wild because- and we can’t believe only now are we learning that scientists are saying this: PENGUINS ALL LOOK ALIKE. Homosexuality is something scientists do see with penguins at the zoo, where, apparently, they must paint them or something to tell them apart.